Hi! I Survived The Heatwave ’26! There better not be another one. Then I’ll have to sayI Survived The Heatwave ’26 A and B and maybe C and so on. And I don’t like using all those letters! Also maybe I WON’T Survive Heatwave ’26 B. THAT’D BLOW. At least then I’d get to see what happens after death. Now I’m one step ahead of everyone else. Now I know something you don’t! Well Being Dead I Probably Won’t Know Anything. Just be dead. There’s the absence of knowing anything! I’ll know that I know nothing. NO I WON’T. I guess that’s what it’s like to be dead. How much do know you don’t know you don’t know you’re knowing nothing? NOT A LOT I’m guessing! Well anyway I saw the Jackass movie which I appreciate is a good film for a Bathroom Breaker like me. I might have missed some good moments but it didn’t ruin the overall experience. Pretty sure one of the goofs they did was called The Bathroom Breaker. About one in three of the things they did you can Bathroom Breaker and it’d more or less apply. Not really. Anyway it made me laugh at times and also mostly just made me think Wait a second why don’t I have a group of friends. Is this something EVEYRONE has but me. My guess is it’s about 50/50. A good amount of people have real friends and a good amount of people don’t! It’s a good guess! Anyway. What if they’re not really friends and just really good actors. Then that’s good too I enjoyed their movie friendship.
Anyway. Almost done with Keith Richards book. I never liked the song Moves Like Jagger because I never CARED about how Mick Jagger moved! Never was a huge Rolling Stones fan but I definitely appreciate their music but I never even really appreciated Mick Jagger’s movement!. I get it’s iconic and people get a kick out of it but NOT ME. Also MOVE LIKE YOURSELF. Do your own thing! Also this is a SONG I’m listening to. Why are you preoccupied with MOVES. You should be focused on THE MUSIC that’s what’s important right now. I guess when they preform it live they have a chance to Move Like Jagger on stage. But we’re not listening to it live though! Huh. Was Richie Rich related to Keith Richards. And he shortened his last name for Tax Reasons? Also what are the odds that someone named Richie Rich would become comically Rich? Very high. His parents were most likely rich when conceiving birthing and raising him. Ok well what were the odds that FATHER, SURNAME RICH, became rich. I dunno we need more information about this Man. Anyway. Got assigned to a new song. No Surprises! It’s easy. Just playing the chords. Simple! And I’ve heard the song enough times that I’ve got it down 100% already. Fun to play because it’s fun to listen to. That’s my feeling.
Radiohead surely there are or will be SOME Surprises. I dunno. I’m happy with No Surprises when listening to recorded music. Anything out of the ordinary that I didn’t hear last time would be most unwelcome! LIVE MUSIC throw in some surprises sure. MP3? I only wanna hear what I heard the last time! Well I dunno. It’s okay if I just NOTICE something new on a Spotify song. I just don’t wanna actually Tangibly Hear Something Tangibly Different. Anyway. Is No Surprises a song about Safe Sex? Using condoms? It’s one thing it’s about. I started re-watching Ted Lasso in preparation for Season IV coming up. It’s pretty good! You’ve seen it I’m sure! And if you haven’t seen it It’s pretty good! Soccer is going on RIGHT NOW as we speak ON THE WORLD STAGE. Each country is competing for a Chalice of sorts per my understanding. The United States was defeated yesterday I saw. That’s okay. I wouldn’t be able to win at soccer either! Don’t worry about it! Pun with “Soccer,” and, “Sock ‘er.” You know like Domestic Violence. Anyway by the end of Keith Richards’ book he’s just giving out recipes for Bangers & Mash. Look just cut the book short. It doesn’t need to be 550 pages. No need to scrape the bottom of the barrel. On the other hand Keith Richards probably just REALLY wanted to share this recipe. In his older years he’s reassessed what’s important to him and IT’S THIS.
Okay. What should we do tonight for fun. Bangers & Mash. Put on Miley Cyrus and play Middle School Game MASH. Mansion Apartment Shack House. Those are the four places on Earth anyone can conceivably live in. THAT’S IT. Anyway. Alternate names for MASH where it’s the exact same game—SHAM…Anyway. Sahm. That could be a word. I’ll call things Sahm. I’ll name my kid Sahm. I don’t give a fuck. SAHM is also the quality of domicile in ascending order. MHAS is descending. Is that a college thing? I’m trying to earn my M.H.A. Makes sense. Oh yeah! That’s what RFKII is trying to do. Make Healthy Again! What a farce. Use The Farce! Could have been the tagline for Spaceballs if they didn’t really respect the audience’s intelligence. That way we know what to expect in the movie. Otherwise not 100% what the Hell this is supposed to be. Anyway. Planets and suns and moons are all kind of Spaceballs. I never really thought about it. Mel Brooks was ahead of the curve. MOST extracurricular objects out there are just big balls in space. No planet is a triangle. Huh. MASHspeaking, Apartment is better than House in lots of places! I’d rather live in an apartment in lots of places in NYC than a house. Get off my back about it. Apartment might be The Ultimate even. The best apartments at least. Also Apartment/Ultimate slant rhyme.
Okay. Hi! I forgot Return Of The Living Dead was an Independence Day movie. Takes place on July 3rd Night mostly. BLEEDING into July 4th! There are Fireworks OF A SORT at the ending. No Surprises. Kinda the most extreme Fireworks you could imagine. Alright okay Surprises it was the kind of fireworks we dropped on Japan twice in World War II. It’s weird that Japan doesn’t hold a grudge against America for NUCLEAR BOMBING THEM… TWICE. If it were me I’d remember that for a few generations. Ah well water on the brudge. I guess they started it! That’s a good point. Anyway. America bombs its own country a lot of times. How many times has America, “Tested,” Nuclear bombs on America. Looks like America Tested 1,000 Nukes or so. IT”S OKAY IT’S OUR LAND. WE OWN IT. ALSO DON’T WORRY I DON’T LIVE TEHRE SO IT’S OKAY. Probably nobody lives there so THE ENVIRONMENT DOESN’T MATTER IT HAS NO WORTH. Anyway. That’d be a good prank for Jackass. Dropping nuclear bomb on someone. Where would they even get nuclear material. HEY if Doc Brown can do it Johnny Knoxville can do it. Johnny Knoxville got the Doc Brown hair these days. White! Doc Brown sounds like either the name of an Ass Doctor OR a pair of shoes RIGHT? Probably! Anyway. That’s all for today. I’ll see ya later on later!
-4:35 P.M.
July 7 2026
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