Author: Crazysheet

    Okay.  Hey!  How did everyone’s Midweek go.  I’ve trained myselve to like the midweek.  I get a BREAK.  I got music classes on Monday and Thursday.  I got writing entries on Tuesday and Thursday.  I got a break on Wednesday!  We can trick ourselves into liking life based on PACING.  By which I mean both (1) carefully tracking our activities and also (2) walking back and forth obsessively.  Also Pace University.  How about that crap.  That could be a Number Three!  Rule of Threes.  Comedy is the rule of threes.  I kinda HAD to include Pace University in this riff if I wanted to be funny!  Anyway, I know going #1 and #2 in the bathroom but what’s #3?  I guess throwing up.  That deserves Being A Number so it slots in nicely.  But it’s not so much of an escalation from #2, though, so I’m not so sure.  #3 should be exponentially more extreme than #2 and throwing up COULD BE BIG but isn’t always.  Whatever it is, Going #3 in the toilet needs to be AN EVENT to say the least.  Maybe this joke is going #3.  It’s a META-moment.  Okay.  Anyway.  I don’t wanna have a Meta-moment!  The Metaverse is strange!  Some weird ass Second Life knockoff bullshit.  No thanks.  Why would anyone think that was a good idea that anyone would be interested in.  Now let me get back to my nonsense blog for no one. 
    I was playing guitar in lobby-receptionist area before SOR class on Monday like always and they told me to stop!  Said in case the lobbyist (AS THEY SHUOLD BE CALLED) had to make a phone call I would be disturbing them.  So I walked out of the room and played guitar in the hallway right outside the lobby.  I ADAPT.  Anyway.  Documentary about Lorne Michaels is just calledLorne.  Not enough information for people who don’t know!  What if it’s about The Raven’s love interest!  That’s not their name.  It’s Pretty Close though, we can’t count out that their name got misinterpreted at some point!  Ok well then I think that’s it. No other Lorne!  I was prepared to riff on 1-3 other minor popular or historical figures named LORNE out there that this movie might be about.  BUT THERE ARE NONE.  I looked it up!  Absolutely NO ONE else named Lorne ever made their mark!  Go figure.  Older people might recognize actor, “Lorne Greene,” but people my age and younger WON’T.  And Children Are The Future so that settles that.  “Children Are The Future,” is lowkey A TRICK.  It implies they ARE NOT THE PRESENT.  Present is what counts.  PRESENT?  THAT’S WHERE I AM RIGHT NOW!  Especially living in a society that seems to have mostly given up on the future.  Children being the future is a cruel joke in a world that’s decided The Future Is Optional!
    Anyway.  Looks like I’m going to the New Pornographers show next week!  Great!  I like them.  I’m looking forward to being 3 inches taller than the last several times I’ve been to my favorite bands’ concerts.  I will be able to see the show several inches more!  Should be good.  I’ve been reading a lot of music books, some of which have been about punk bands.  We’re still supposed to spit on the band right.  That’s what I’m prepared to do!  Michael that’s wrong.  That only happened in a very specific subculture a long time ago.  Oh okay thanks.  I don’t think I can spit that much anyway!  The amount of spit I’m imagining that was the proper amount to spit on the band in British Classic Punk Spit is like 5x the amount of spit I could conjure up even if I spent a lot of time working up all the spit I could muster!  DO I HAVE LESS MOUTH MOISTURE or did THEY HAVE TOO MUCH.  I dunno.  Anyway.  Their opening act is A Guy From A Band I Know Of!  Doesn’t get much better than that.  I know and like ONE of the songs from this band so I’m very invested in This Guy.  Anyway.  I saw the New Pornographers once before.  It was a good time!  I remember making eye contact with one of them at one point during a song and being likeNow I’m part of the music!  Music alone is pretty good but when it’s combined with human interaction it takes it to another level!
    Sure.  Music alone IS Human Interaction.  Oh.  Okay.  I don’t know about that.   I dunno.  Maybe I’ll see the new The Mummy this weekend.  I have good feelings about this franchise because I was born in 1920 and liked The Mummy film from the 1930’s.  YEAH.  Anyway sure I liked the Brendan Fraiser movie but there’s practically 0% inside me that makes me feel likeSure I liked that movie so of course I’d like any other movie that has the word, “Mummy,” in the title but otherwise is a completely different movie.  I don’t know why movie studio would assume We Audience would feel any different.  Movie studio got their own agenda.  They’re up to something!  They keep giving us weird different mediocre Mummies on SOME logical basis I JUST DON’T KNOW WHAT IT IS.  Is there a band name with Mummy in the title.  Seems like there should be.  Unless it’s copyrighted by Universal.  Well what if you’re signed to Universal.  Then Great I’m Happy It’s All Working Out For You.  Hmm.  There’s Mumford and Sons.  Great.  Get out of my house.  Anyway.  I never saw the original The Mummy but I THINK I know how to deal with the monster—BRISKLY WALK AWAY?  I could be wrong.  Could be misinterpreting the villain’s powers?  But from my understanding A SLOW JOG should be able to get you to safety?
    Anyway.  I guess you could say the same thing about Old Fashioned Slow Zombies.  But when there’s Slow Zombies there’s A LOT OF THEM around to worry about.  There’s just ONE MUMMY to keep track of.  Important distinction!  Some British Kids might have Two Mummies IT’S OKAY IT’S NATURAL THAT’S HOW SOME FAMILIES WORK.  Hey shut up.  Anyway.  For a while there people were really into Ancient Egypt.  Good.  It’s better to be into SOME History than NO history.  And Egypt was pretty Hoppin!  Shit was happening!  When you learn World History in high school A LOT is devoted to Egypt History simply because SO MUCH OF THE STUFF THAT HAPPENED happened there.  THEY DID PYRAMIDS.  LOOK AT IT.  You didn’t do the pyramids. THEY DID.  Anyway.  How come you can’t chooseHieroglyphics as a foreign language in high school.  I know it’s a dead language I don’t care.  MY FREEDOM MY CHOICE.  No written language is ever really dead.  AS long as it’s there IT’S STILL TEHRE.  Spanish was one of the 2 or 3 classes I failed and had to re-take in High School.  One of the levels of Spanish.  Chemistry.  Possibly a third.  JOKES ON YOU.  I took more raw classes overall than my peers!  I got more out of school it looks like!  I win.  Spanish Chemistry.  Is that thing.  Combine em up?  Anyway.  I’m done.  I’ll see ya next week.

-3:11 P.M.

APRIL 16 2026      

    You know it!  Time for some Crazysheet.  That’s what I’ll be doing now.  Gonna be interrupted halfway through the entry to go pick up some laundry.  From the laundromat.  Then later on in the evening when it’s over I’ll get some dinner.  From the dinermat.  Later on some more I’ll take a shower in the showermat.  Then even more later on I’ll go to bed.  Sleeping on a… mat…that checks out I guess.  EXCUSE ME I BELIEVE IT’S CALLED A MatTTRESS.  Us people and our precious words.  If I wanna say I sleep on a mat I can say I sleep on a mat!  MAYBE I sleep on a rubber mat that they use for public school gymnasiums you don’t know.  I think after Rubber Soul the Beatles should have putRubber before every record title.  Rubber Revolver.  Rubber Magical Mystical Tour.  Rubber (Self Titled).  You get the idea.  Once you do something you gotta commit to it I feel!  THAT’S HOW MUSIC WORKS!  Anyway I’m getting better at the couple of blues songs I was having trouble with.  Still can’t play them the way they’re supposed to be played.  But I can play them Badly Well.  I can play SOMETHING in Silence’s Place.  It won’t sound good.  But you’re gonna hear something happen instead of nothing.  “That sounds like an amateur succeeding in TRYING to play the guitar!”  Something like that.
   Anyway.  Got three new songs assigned to me including the very exciting Johnny B Goode.  Gonna have to Marty McFly it up.  My whole life has led to this.  Anyway.  The title Johnny B Goode lives very much in the same universe as Good Will Hunting.  YEAH.  I should ask band and teacher if I could do dialogue from Back To The Future before we play the song.  Confusing Many but Amusing Some!  I don’t think I’m gonna do that.  Oh well.  “This song is an oldie but a goodie.. well it’s an oldie where I come from…”  I’d be amused if I was in the audience seeing that!  And partly confused I Guess.  GREAT.  Anyway.  I also found out the theme for the songs we’re gonna do over Summer.90’s Rock.  WOW.  Delightful!  I think I can really groove this kinda music!  The kind of music I’m assuming it is!  MAYBE It’s the music The Rolling Stones and other similar-aged legends will be putting out ten years from now.  When they’re in THEIR 90’S.  THAT KIND OF 90’S ROCK.  All about what it’s like to be in your 90’s.  We wanna relate to that!  How about rock where you only play in the 9’s on the fret board on the guitar.  Also zeroes I guess.  I don’t.. wha… NO.  OH NO I might have to tune my guitar back and forth a lot.  ALT ROCK IS ALT TUNING everyone knows that.  Alt Rock dominated the 90’s.  We’re assuming that’s what 90’s rock will focus on.  You know what happens when you assume.  SURE I DO.  I ASSUME ALL THE TIME OF COURSE I KNOW WHAT HAPPENS I’M USED TO IT.  ALL I DO IS ASSUME.  VERY COMMON ACTIVITY.
   Anyway.  I guess it’s time for some more things to say.  Why is a documentary about Lorne Michaels being shown in my local movie theater.  I might see it!  But why is it there?  I don’t understand this universe.  I don’t like this galaxy either.  I don’t GET galaxies.  Galaxies are really big but they’re small compared to universes but they’re EXTREMELY BIG STILL so overallconfusing I DON’T LIKE BEING CONFUSED?  THERE’S WAY MORE STARS AND WHATKNOT OUT THERE than I imagine as baseline.  I know logically they tell us how much stars and galaxies and etc. there are.  But in my head I still imagine the universe being about .0001% as big as it is!  Not just in empty space, but how much it’s composed of stuff.  SO MUCH STUFF OUT THERE I DON’T BELIEVE IT.  Anyway.  I do like the nameThe Milky Way though.  Kinda indie.  Offbeat a little.  Something weird but lyrical about it that I appreciate!   I remember as a kid being confused being toldhey look at that constellation in the sky… That’s The Milky Way!  UH… I THOUGHT WE WERE IN THE MILKY WAY.  How can THAT be that Milky Way.  I’M IN THE MILKY WAY.  How can something far away be the Milky Way?!  It makes sense a little but also is pretty dumb a lot.  For a kid it’s insightful.  For an adult you should just shut your mouth and pretend you understand everything.
   Anyway.  I should be able to play Johnny B Goode but can I prance like Chuck Berry and/or Michael J Fox while I’m doing it?  People want to see Me Make A Fool Of Myself.  DO A PRANCE during the song.  CULTURALLY APPROPRIATE MUSIC PERFORMANCE.  But with no ill will.  AnywayJust Went TO Laundromat.  It was great!  I’m back already!  How come there’s not a famous rapper namedIll Will.  Seems like we should have gotten to that a long time ago.  At this point it’s kinda too late I think!  There’s probably some people out there who thought to call themselvesIll Will.  They just never really caught on!*  Anyway.  I think this entire time Chuck Berry really wishes he was a Bell Player.  He plays his guitar just like he’s ringing a bell.  The subtext is THE NARRATOR WISHES HE WAS RINGING A BELL.  Sad that he never figured that out for himself!  Stuck playing the guitar his entire life and not ringing a bell as far as I know.  I never saw any movie about Chuck Berry’s life so I don’t know.  I saw The Life Of Chuck but IT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM!  Anyway so I was just looking at google and apparently Chuck Berry’s ONLY #1 hit wasMy Ding-A-Ling.  So make of that what you will!  I THINK IT ALL ADDS UP.
    Ok.  Anyway.  What else is up.  I think it’s great that the people born after the 90’s in my class are still excited about 90’s Rock.  Maybe there’s something intangible about that music that’s good and I don’t Really Like It just because It Was My Turn To Like That Music based on when I was born and/or when I grew up.  Anyway.  I hope we get some mostly good 90’s rock but also some Cheesy 90’s rock.  Like MATCHBOX 20.  NOT A LOT.  Just 1 or 2 generic nostalgia crowdpleasers.  I AM SMART I think there should be “cringe” songs in the setlist.  If I ask for it first then when we’re assigned it I can say I asked for it first.  Great.  How about CHUMBAWUMBA.  You idiots.  I dunno.  It’s not my job to pick.   I just play the songs!  Ideally without emotion and off to the side!  I play them with emotion.  I FEEL THINGS.  I feel like I Wanna Get It Right.  When I play I feel likeI Wish I Practiced This More I Wanna Get This Right And Then Onto The Next Song Which I Wanna Get Right Too Despite Not Practicing Enough.  IT’S EMOTION. If you can’t see that in the audience then THAT’S ON YOU REALLY.  Learn how to read people.  Okay.  Anyway.  What if Marty McFly played an original song at his parents’ high school dance.  How would that have changed the world.  Would it have been for the better or for worse.  We’ll never know I guess but I think it would have been more honest of him!  I think we all wanna hear aPinheads song!  Anyway.  I’ll see ya later.

-4:15 P.M.

APRIL 14 2026        

*Nas had a friend named Ill WIll apparently. He never caught on cause he died young. I suppose Ill Will left some sort of ILL WILL dictating the distribution of his leftovers to his loved ones. THANKS

    Sure.  “This’s,” should be a word.  Maybe it is!  Anyway I might see Faces Of Death this weekend.  What’s a good face of death.  Tongue sticking out and going cross eyed.  That’s my first instinct.  Another one is X’s over the eyes and stiches over the mouth.  That makes sense.  I don’t wanna look at the dead!  I try to avoid registering what faces the dead are making.  This might not be the movie for me then.  IT’S FICTION.  It’s make believe.  IT’s play pretend!  I think I can handle a little bit of Fool Arounding!  And if not I can always exit the theater the same way I got in.  Not the emergency exit.  Some theaters have regular exit and emergency exit and several of the times I almost accidently take emergency exit potentially causing a huge problem!  If I go through Emergency Exit DoorsI assume sprinklers will automatically go off and a voice will come down telling everyone to remain calm and vacate the building.  I dunno!  Anyway.  GOT MY NEW SHOESES.  I ordered new pairs of regular sneakers and new pair of elevation shoes.  Both same exact models of old pairs.  Got em both.    Old Elevation Shoes, worn for close to three years, For Sale, Not For Babies, poor condition.  Is that a poem.  Well it’s not a craigslist listing.
    Anyway.  I am a big fan of horror films but I never seen the original Faces Of Death.  Dose that qualify as a horror film?  What percent of the things in Faces Of Death are actually real deaths.  I’m under the impression it’s SOME.  Google says it’s about 50/50.  But the biggest, most graphic ones are fake!  Great.  I don’t think I wanna see that.  Then again I often feel like I have nothing to watch when I’m watching TV and one day that might be available to me and I might be open to watching to it, I dunno!  How about Faces Of LIFE.  And it’s about births.  That’s even more disturbing to me.  I’d puke seeing lots of births.  I’ve seen some births here and there.  They sneak graphic births into films and TV and whatknot! I’ve been desensitized to that perversion of life!  How about Faces Of WORKPLACE ACCIDENTS.  Just people getting injured on the job.  I guess that’s okay.  Nice middle ground.  I can handle something like that.  As long as it’s not too serious.  But also not TOO UNSERIOUS where there’s no stakes, either!  Gotta be a nice middle ground to their Getting Hurt!  Anyway.  I don’t care. I don’t!  My Mom told me a few years ago to buy black shoes so that when they get dirty you won’t notice as much and that’s one of the most profound things she’s ever said.  I’m not used to giving my mom credit for lots of things but it’s hard to argue with that.  It makes sense!
    Anyway.  Of course my first reaction was fuck that let other people worry about that crap I’m buying grey sneakers.  But this time around I was like Maybe my Mom was right.  I’ll go with the black this time around.  Good.  How are the people doing In Space.  What if they just decide to not come back.  Do they kind of become our Gods.  They live up in the sky.  And there’s nothing we can do about it!  Sounds like Gods to me.  Anyway something to think about.  But Michael they have no power.  They can drop waste on us!  Off the top of my head that’s one thing.  You wouldn’t like that.  You thought that panoramic picture of Earth was a nice thing.  THAT SHIT WAS A RANSOM NOTE.  Anyway.  If Gavin Newsom Ran for president… RAN….Ransom.. New… RAN… Ransom…. What the Hell Is going on there…  The best thing about Gavin Newsom that doesn’t get enough press is his first name.  Gavin!  Delightful!  That’s probably his best attribute!  These are the thing mainstream commentators won’t talk about.  Only ancillary stream commentators like ME.  I love the name Gavin but I wouldn’t be surprised if Newsom himself was a self-hating Gavin.  Just based on the way he carries himself.  I DUNNO.  Something to think about!  Anyway.  “The Spirit Of Gavin.”  Is that something? Is it anything?  I dunno.  It’s Giving nothing.
   That’s a phrase.  It’s GIVING …  I heard it somewhere musta been television!  It’s weird how a lot of people live lives and then a lot of people just watch television.  Different ways to go about your time on this planet!  IT’S A SLIDING SCALE.  Most people live some fraction of a life and also watch some fraction of television whether its on TV or the internet!  YEAH.  Anyway.  Is there a thing where I can choose to have my corpse sent into outerspace when I’m dead.  Or maybe I can be cremated and then sent into outerspace if that’s more convenient.  I wanna get as far away from you assholes as possible!  That’s pretty much my top priority when I’m dead.  Accomplish what I couldn’t in life!  GET THE HELL AWAY FROM YOU PEOPLE.  Anyway.  In the meantime let’s be friends!  Okay.  I always felt like I wouldn’t wanna be cremated on the small, off chance zombification occurs.  I wanna leave myself a window to become the undead no matter how unlikely it is.  What’s the benefit TO ME to be cremated.  NOTIN.  On the other hand If I keep a body I’M STILL IN THE GAME.  But Michael every time we see corpses returning to life in fiction they never seem happy or having a good time or pleased to be back. Why would you want that experience.  We don’t know how it’ll play out in real life!  Maybe it won’t be so bad!
   Anyway.  I don’t feel sick anymore.  Haven’t felt sick in maybe 48 hours!  I haven’t felt sick since watching 48 hours with Eddie Murphy and Nick Nolte!  Nick Doesn’t Take Nolte For An Answer!  Guy going to see the film 48 Hours when it first came out and being ready to be in the theater for the next two days. IS THAT A THING.  What’s the longest regular popular movie of the last century.  Internet says CLEOPATRA (1963) clocking in at 4 hours.  WOW.  I CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT.  I can make a movie that’s 5 hours.  I’m really talented, see!  I can make the longest movie ever if that’s what it came to!  Anyway when I was a kid I remember Titanic came out and was over three hours and that was like an EVENT.  Its absurd length was part of its novelty!  So that’s good.  Anyway.  When I went to see Titanic I was around 8 and some old lady goes to me before the movie You know this really happened!  And instead of internally rolling my eyes and saying Yeah I know I shoulda been a jerk and said Yeah You Should Know You Were There Right!  BURNED.  I’m still upset I missed a burn 30 years ago.  I’m not much of a burner.  Maybe then I was.  Other kids.  Not now.  I don’t burn people.  MAYBHE I SHUOLD START.  I dunno at the time being on Titanic wouldn’t necessarily make her Insanely Comically Old.  Titanic sinking was only 85 years before this movie theater interaction!  Ugh.  Anyway that’s all.  I’ll see ya later.

-3:48 P.M.

APRIL 9 2026

    Whatever.  How’s everyone doing?  What’s on YOUR mind?  Who cares.  What’s on MY Mind, that’s what people wanna read about!  Okay.  I don’t have things on my mind.  I just DO things.  I think that’s pretty universal.  I guess I think a little bit about the things I’m doing and have done recently and the things that I have coming up!  Either way my personal life is going okay but on a global scale it’s terrifying.  As long as I can tune out Everything I’m pretty happy. I don’t want to tune everything out though.  I go out of my way to stay informed IT’S IMPORTANT.  Got some jerk threatening a civilization with nuclear weapons on social media.  NO THANKS.  I’m not, “Down,” with that sort of thing!  Anyway I was sick all night.  I took the covid vaccine booster yesterday morning and it kicked in last night!  Great!  That’s how you know it’s working.  Couldn’t stay asleep because of a huge shoulderache and feeling weak and feverish and whatknot.  Stayed in bed today until around 2:30 PM.  NOW I FEEL OK FOR NOW.  Started re-binge watching RENO 9/11.  Good show!  Makes me laugh.  I’d rather watch comedy TV than live in fear and think about it and face the facts that we’re ruled by evil greedy insane people and no one seems to be willing to do anything about it.  Sometimes I can watch comedy TV AND live in fear and think about it and face the facts that we’re ruled by evil greedy insane people etc.  Multi-task!
    Cool.  I dunno.  We’ll figure something out!  Doesn’t seem like it.  SURE WE WILL.  YOU’LL SEE.  I for one am against the country I live in and support with my tax dollars doing Ethnic Cleansing.  Gotta make my truth heard!  I don’t find that kind of position or action acceptable from a representative or leader!  Anyway.  What else is going on.  Maybe if I was a better person I’d live in a better universe.  If I put betterness out there I’d get butterness back.  THIS IS ALL MY FAULT I guess.  Hmm.  In what way am I a bad person.  Just kind of an asshole all in all when you think about it.  Oh Okay.  I guess I kinda don’t relate to people well.  Is that a sin.  Is that one of the ten commandments. Thou Shalt Relate To Everyone And Get On With One Another.  I dunno.  I’m a leech on my parents.  THEY SUPPORT ME FINANCIALLY.  Bad Son.  Bad Seed.  I’m the bad seed!  That’s two things that are wrong with me.  A THIRD THING AND I’M OUT.  Hmm. I’m short.  Pretty sure that counts.  Yep.  That’s the third thing!  Anyway.  Now I gotta do Three Good Things to counterbalance those bad things.  WHAT HUBRIS.  That’s the fourth thing that’s wrong with me.  To even THINK I can DO A GOOD THING.  Fourth Wrong Thing About Me.  
   Anyway.  Had a good music class yesterday.  Teacher made us all put on guitars, even the non-guitar players, and ham it up.  Not even play real stuff.  Just play pretend.  ALL TO MAKE ME FEEL COMFORTABLE I assume.  Worked a little bit!  I still DON’T feel comfortable playing guitar and making movements.  Whether it’s facial expressions or wilding out with my guitar or anything.  BEST I CAN DO is walk around the stage a little bit.  That I can handle.  That gets the message across I’M INTO IT.  I still prefer Just Standing There or even better Sitting Down.  It’s easier for me and besides the music should take centerstage.  But I understand that for Rock Band Music it can help to make a show out of it.  Anyway.  I realized that the entire 2.5 seasons I’ve been in School Of Rock every time we have practice or do a real show I always stand in the back and off to the side for every song.  Where no one can see me.  That’s where the guitar amps are!  But still, cables are long!  I guess I can start making a habit of walking around way up to the front center of the stage sometimes if I want to.  If I’m confident in the song and want everyone to see me, the guitar player, and whatknot.  Great.  Hmm.  That’s where singers stand though.  Front and center.  They’re already there!  Why should I try to take over their space!
    Okay.  Anyway.  We should organize ourselves in ascending height order possibly.  Like elementary school class photo.  Anyway I saw Louie CK and Kanye West are back for some reason.  Not really sure why.  Guess a lot of people just don’t care anymore.  It hurts my feelings as someone who vaguely cares a little bit.  I WON’T be going to the Kanye Westfest or the Louie CKomedy Show.  They’re still the same shitty people they were before and also my impression is they’re not even putting out very good work these days.  But whatever.  Not even GOOD Shitty People.  I’m a shitty person but they’re REALLY SHITTY people.  They have done and/or said terrible things and shown no remorse and then gotten rewarded for it.  I’ve JUST SAID kinda dumb things and DONE kinda POINTLESS THINGS and also NOT gotten rewarded for it!  Oh well.  I’m sure I’ve done or said some straight up bad things in my life.  Hmm.  Yeah We Went Over This!  The three or four things that I’m bad person for!  IT’S BEEN COVERED.  Hmm.  The point is The World Is Wrong.  The world is doing the wrong thing by accepting Kanye and Louie back.  BAD DECISION.  BAD WORLD.  You’re putting lots of people through pain and distress by platforming these men, so go fuck off with that!
    Okay.  Good.  Hope I don’t feel sick tonight.  Usually when I feel sick from Covid Vaccine it lasts several nights in a row!  Anyway.  I dunno.  WELL anyway at least I can watch several dozen episodes of Reno 0911.  That’s a pretty funny show.  I looked up Forgotten TV Comedy Gems from the 2000’s online in hopes that Reno 911 was given credit but ya know what?  None of those lists included Reno 911!  Seems wrong.  Maybe because the compilers Never Forgot Reno 911.  Because it’s certainly funny enough!  NEVER FORGET.  Anyway.  I remember good times watching the Reno 911 movie in my dormitory on the NYU channel.  NYU had its own channel!  Showed movies before anyone else!  Well, not before theaters.  But before HBO and whatknot.  Good stuff.  That’s something I remembered.  Go figure.  Now I don’t even HAVE to remember it!  It’s written out in the weblog.  If I ever wanna think about it again all I have to do is read this!  Easy!  Hmm.  That’s not good.  The more I talk the more I train myself to forget things.  Well I’m talking about it so it will be preserved on the internet forever so I don’t really NEED to remember it.  But that’s not a good way to go about your brain.  Huh.  Now I can do other stuff with my brain besides remember stuff.  What else is there.  MATH FUNCTIONS.  IMAGINATIONING.  Just THINKING about things if that’s what the situation calls for!  Anyway that’s it.  I’ll see ya later.

-6:47 P.M. 
       
   APRIL 7 2026

    Great.  How’s everyone doing.  What’s going on in your life.  And the person sitting next to you’s life.  And some strangers’ lives.  I want to know what’s going on in EVERYONE’S lives.  That’d be weird.  Anyway here’s some five paragraphs that are my life-centric.  Centric could be a bandname.  It will be one day.  Everything will be a bandname EVENTUALLY.  Unless music stops being at thing at some point, then logic tells us as time goes on, we run out of band names, eventually we have to use increasingly more and more obscure band names.  So eventually Everything Is A Band Name.  Unless music stops being a thing at some point!  I prefer the lots of bad band names scenario to music stopping.  Anyway we just got a new Vacuum Cleaner.  If Vacuum Cleaner was a band name what would it mean.  Initials are VC.  Might be a reference to the Viet Cong.  Vietname War.  That’s the only thing I can think of that it might mean.  Otherwise I’m drawing a blank.  I saw the trailer for the new Supergirl movie.  I don’t really like Space Movies!  I can trick myself into liking A Star Wars here or a Project Hail Mary there but just in general I relate to Earth Movies a lot more than Outer Space Movies.  Just don’t GET aliens and/or their settings.  Not like Humans On Earth.  PEOPLE ON THIS PLANET?  NOW THIS I UNDERSTAND. 
    Not really.  Okay.  Maybe I just don’t get THE GROOVE for Supergirl (2026) like I did for Superman (2025).  Maybe Supergirl isn’t made for me specifically to groove on and/or with.  I DIUNNO pretty sure Everything Is Made Specifically For Me.  Oh okay gotta see the movie to find out.  Anyway.  The dog is still there in this movie.  But now the dog is kind of Betraying Superman by being friends with Supergirl so it’s not all good feelings.  They’re all friends together.  There’s nothing wrong there.  I dunno.  Dog gotta choose one.  Pick a True Best Friend.  And ya know what at this point it’s too late Now You Get No One.  JUST LEAVE DOG.  YOU GET NO BEST FRIEND.  NOBODY WANTS YOU NOW.  Anyway.  His name is Krypto!  I discovered HBO had a Sci-Fi spin off of Tales From The Crypt that lasted one season that’s mostly available on youtube.  If you’re a Tales From The Crypto fanatic like I am look it up!  What’s it called Michael that will help me look it up.  Hmm.  What’s it called.  Perversions Of Science.  It’s okay!  Hmm.  Initials are POS.  I guess it’s implying that each episode is a Piece Of Shit.  But they’re not!  They’re mostly 65% as good as any Tales From The Crypt episode are and/or is!  Anyway.  The Crypt Keeper character is a CGI Sexy Female Robot.  She’s okay!  She’s very suggestive, I’ll tell ya that much!
   Okay.  I don’t know what to do with life.  My music hasn’t quite been getting better lately.  My blog writing has atrophied.  My critical thinking skills aren’t great.  I figure do the things I’ve been doing and cross my fingers and hope for the best.  WRONG.  GOTTA change something somehow.  Oh okay.  Maybe the change can be something FUN though.  Like start Drinking Heavily or something.  Maybe that’s the key!  That sounds promising!  Anyway.  That’s not a realistic option.  TRY HARDER is the best option.  Do what I’m doing but with more TRYING. Ugh.  I haven’t tried since I was in high school!  Had to put in a lot of time and effort studying for tests and writing papers.  And guess what it sucked!  Didn’t I have to do that for college, too.  YEAH but somewhat less.  College was significantly easier and less work than high school.  Feels kinda weird I got a degree to be honest.  I don’t remember learning much of anything.  Anything worthwhile I did learn for tests or wrote papers on went one in ear and out the other.  Now it’s happening again at School Of Rock!  I don’t remember how to play the Pat Benatar songs or Rolling Stones songs I learnt I don’t think!  Although if I looked at how to play them it might jog my memory and I’d pick it right back up quick. Plus my general skill level at guitar may have gotten irrevocably better.  THEN AGAIN MAYBE IRRETRIEVABLY WORSE.  I dunno.
    Okay.  What’s the point.  Maybe the point is I’m unqualified to do anything.  I have an English Degree but it means nothing because I learned nothing.  Maybe other people with an English degree it actually means something.  They KNOW THEIR STUFF and they’re GOOD AT IT.  For me it just means I read a Charles Dickens book once and passed a couple of tests confirming I did in fact read the book and that’s pretty much it more or less… maybe I wrote a half assed essay or two that were 50% summary.  And that academic level experience over the course of, what, two or three dozen classes?  BACHELOR’S DEGREE.  Hmm.  Maybe that’s why I do bad, un-trying creative things.  I did poor, un-trying Academic Work.  How can I break the trend.  I’m not sure it’s possible to break a trend.  Trends are one of the toughest things in the universe.  Trends by definition can be broken.  Yeah but they also By Definition TREND NOT TO BE BROKEN.  Huh. Lemme think about this one.  Anyway.  This is the trend.  My only friend the trend.  I don’t understand how Jason Momoa was Aquaman and now is someone else.  You can’t do that!  It’s the same universe of films more or less.  What about Robert Downey Junior being Iron Man and now coming back as Dr. Doom.  I don’t like that either now that you bring it up!  What about Jesus returning after three days of being dead.  NOT A FAN OF THAT EITHER now that you bring that up!  Anyway.  What was Christ doing for exactly three days.  Just hanging out.  But what took that amount of time precisely?  And then after 72 hours he looks at his watch and is like well they’ve worried about me enough…
    I might be getting things mixed up.  I dunno how it went down.  Anyway.  Wasn’t THAT the second coming of Christ?  Him showing up 3 days later?  And if he comes back again, that’d be the THIRD coming?  If we wanna be pedantic about things?  Again, I dunno exactly what happened.  Not like you.  You probably know exactly what happened!  Anyway.  WHAT IS AQUAMAN DOING IN SPACE.  I was confused!  No one should have to feel that way!  Anyway.  A big part of Superman’s deal is that He’s Helping People.  I thought that would translate to Supergirl.  How is she helping people if she’s not even on Earth.  ERGO I can’t relate to this movie!  OH NO.  There’s Astronauts circling the moon or something right now as we speak.  I’m gonna trust they have a good reason for doing it but a big part of me thinks they just felt like doing it for fun.  They’re testing The Orion’s life support systems.  I don’t know what that means exactly but OK.  IF YOU SAY SO.  SURE.  I’ll believe you for the most part!  Is this related to Orion: The Production Company?  I’ve seen that logo before movies!  Huh.  Okay.  HMM.  Probably more of a reference to Orion’s Belt.  If that constellation didn’t exist I guess Orion’s Pants would drop?  Sorry.  WHO IS Orion.  Some Greek Asshole I’m guessing.  Anyway.  That’s all.  See ya next week.

-2:57 P.M.        

APRIL 2 2026

    There’s nothing good about that title.  I don’t know why anyone would commit to it.  What kind of PERSON.  Anyway let’s write entry.  Today is the last day of March.  Finally, we get to stop Marching!  If you’re anything like me you’ll agree we’ve been Marching forever.  Now I know how soldiers feel.  They have to march all the time. For practice.  When it counts.  In March like the rest of us.  Anyway.  Where am I going with this.  What Am I Marching Toward.  I dunno.  I dunno what to talk about!  I don’t know what to think about.  I don’t know what to do about.  Well what’s been on my mind lately.  Okay.  I don’t wanna dignify myself with an answer.  I don’t feel comfortable talking to myself.  I prefer talking to the MEDIUM FORMAT that I’m preforming in.  I start talking to myself, I get distracted, then who knows if I’lll ever recover!  Anyway what’s on YOUR mind, Other Michael.  WELL I’m a little concerned that I’m having difficulty with coming up with things to talk about!  Oh okay.  There’s many topics to talk about!  FILM.  TECHNOLOGY.  LITERATURE.  WOODWORKING.  THE EPHEMERAL.  Stop me at any time.  I see there’s a new show The Pitt and to me it seems like it’s just Doctors Being Doctors.  What’s the big deal?  What makes it special?  Something better make it special!  Otherwise I don’t like it!       
    I assume it specializes in Pit Doctors.  Armpit doctors.  Take care of that zone of the body specifically.  Someone’s gotta do it and so far I’ve never seen any other doctor do it before!  Anyway.  Last night I watched the first half of My Dinner With Andre.  I like Wallace Shawn who was also from Clueless.  He’s literally my height!  Good movie!  If someone like HIM can get to have dinner with an old friend maybe there’s hope for me too!  Anyway I wouldn’t wanna do that.  The conversation is stimulating enough to enjoy privately but if I was actually there having dinner with Andre I’d be like Oh No How Do I Get Out Of Here I’m Not Having Fun Lemme Go Home Please.  Also compared to his co-star this guy is ANDRE THE GIANT am I right?  Anyway.  Why couldn’t the movie have been called My Dinner With Shawn.  BOYCOTT THIS MOVIE WITH ME.  Shawn Wallace erasure!  That took up a few sentences.  Wallace Shawn.  Shawn Wallace.  I really don’t know what his name is anymore!  It’s Wallace Shawn.  Okay I’ll remember that.  Anyway.  I wanna eat what they’re eating in the movie.  They get the same main course but each gets a different appetizer and I wanna eat all three of the different meals they get.  3 out of 4 stars.  MMM MOVIES.
    New Topic Time.  Who decided we should rate things by STARS.  What does A STAR have to do with rating things?  They probably mean Asterisks.  Those make sense as a place holder.  No critic is rating things by Astronomy Stars.  Hmm.  We’ll never know.  Anyway.  You can’t spell Asterisk without At Risk.  I don’t know why you would want to!  Anyway where is my life Marching to.  Not just right now in this entry but existentially.  What am I marching towards.  Well, death of course, like everyone else.  I meant before that!  In the meantime!  I guess I’m heading towards Pre-death then I suppose.  I think I can do better than pre-death!  Life is more than pre-death!  I dunno, somethin’ll happen.  You’ll see!  Anyway.  I assume The Pitt is sponsored by Axe Body Spray.  In real life I assume Axe Body Spray is long bankrupt and out of business.  That’s too bad.  What else is going on.  Been watching TV this weekend, you guys ever do that?  Probably!  But I’m not sure!  That’s your business though.  Well, your recreational time.  Not really your BUSINESS to watch TV.  How could you monetize Watching TV!  Hmm.  Maybe it’s possible.  Maybe I should look into that.
    New Tupac Time.  Yeah.  In middle school a friend once told me that any music attributed to Tupac was made and released by the real Tupac and any music assigned to 2pac was made and released by an imposter post-Real-Tupac’s-death.  I didn’t find out until later that That’s Just Wrong.  That’s a thing in life.  People just confidently say things That Are Just Wrong.  Something I picked up at some point!  Anyway.  There was a No Kings protest pretty close to where I lived but I didn’t go to it.  I didn’t have material to make a sign!  I slept through it anyway!  It was a bit too far to walk!  I protested in my own way by improving PROTEST MUSIC.  No King.  Knocking.  Hmm.  Interesting.  They’re good people I assume.  I can only wonder what kind of great lifelong friends I’m mussing out on by not going to that one event.  My Dinner With No Kings.  You ever play No Kings Poker.  It’s just poker but No Kings.  Take the kings out of the deck!  Really levels up the skill level required for the game.  Takes it to the next level!  Good luck making a straight ending in Ace that’s all I’m gonna say.  You’ll have some difficulty there!  Anyway Here’s a tip for United States Military worried about how to deal with Strait of Whatever in Iran War—What beats Strait?  A FLUSH.  You figure the rest out!  I’ve done my part!
   Cool.  Here’s a popsicle joke I just came up with. What Chocolate was the first pronouns?  HER/SHEY.  Well anyway what should I do for the rest of the night.  Well I have several options.  Not really.  Really only one option.  What I end up doing. IT’S BEEN WRITTEN IN THE ASTERICKS.  Asteroids.  I dunno.  Maybe I should rewatch Armageddon.  I watched that a lot when I was younger but I haven’t seen it in at least five or seven years.  When I was a child I acted as a child would and when I was an adult I simply lost contact with the film Armageddon.  Okay.  Imagine if they made an Armageddon II.  NOW ACTUALLY IMAGINE IF THEY REALLY MADE AN ARMAGEDDON II FOR A REAL.  Imagine it actually happening for real.  Don’t just play around.  IMAGINE IT.  I guess the plot is oh look ANOTHER meteor is heading towards the Earth… again so soon!  Or it could be a different kind of Armageddon.  I dunno.  Ideally it’s the kind of Armageddon that The Surviving Oil Drillers can solve.  Oh I Know the Armageddon is Climate Change.  And you can get them to help by telling them to Just Stop Drilling.  Ok.  But getting half a dozen drillers to stop wouldn’t solve climate change.  IT’S A START.  Anyway.  I guess that’s it.  I’ll see ya later.

-5:07 P.M.

MARCH 31 2026     

    Awesome.  Here’s somethin’ I guess.  How’s everyone doing?  I’m making progress with these Relatively Tough Blues Songs for School Class.  Some of these, “licks” are difficult!  How do you spell, “Lick,” in this context.  Better Lick That Up Right Quick.  Internet seems comfortable with spelling it, “Lick.”  Good.  WE LEARNT SOMETHING.  Or at least CONFIRMT SOMETHING.  I think in popular music they talk about oral sex like it’s like licking a lollipop but that tells me you’ve only experienced or seen at most one of those activities.  Probably neither is what I’m suspecting.  Maybe I’m the wrong one I Dunno.  Also shake it like a polaroid picture?  I can’t SHAKE MYSELF THAT FAST.  I’d hurt myself trying.  The new Academy Award for casting is the Outkast award.  The winner outcasted all the other movie film enterprises that year!  Well done.  Looks like we got a new Weezer song coming out tomorrow.  Weezer has always been there for me and for you.  They might not be the coolest band but they sure got a lot of interesting good songs.  Also they might be the coolest band!  I dunno!  I’m not sure what the Cool Algorithm is!  NO CLUE what determines coolness At All.  Hmm what is the coolest band.  Probably The Replacements.  MAYBE Miles Davis.  Could be I dunno off the top of my head DAVID BOVIE.
   Okay.  Must be hard to be cool.  Constantly gotta keep up being cool.  Indefinitely.  Forever. That’d be a huge hassle and very difficult!  Then again if you’re cool it might come completely naturally so it’s no problem at all to keep being cool.  Oh Ok.  If you’re not cool though but you’re temporarily cool so much pressure to keep being cool.  At any given moment you might do something and then your audience will be like WAIT A SECOND… THAT WASN’T COOL.  I thought this guy was cool!  This latest thing they did wasn’t cool!  I’m OUTTA HERE!  Okay.  That’s why I’m comfortable being Lame and Weird.  It comes naturally to me so it’s no problem doing it forever and people aren’t upset or surprised when I am weird and lame moreso!  What was I talking about.  WHO CARES IT TOOK UP HALF A PARAGRAPH.  And it took up some of your time as well.  Thirty seconds.  Ten minutes.  I dunno how long it takes for you to read.  Hmm.  My new band name is Thirty Seconds To Ten Minutes.  Very good.  If only Thirty Seconds To Mars had some real bangers, they could be the band they play when humans land on mars.  Gotta put on some sort of soundtrack for when that happens.  What were they playing when Apollo 11 landed on the moon?  Ain’t No Mountain High Enough I think.  I dunno just throw on some Seven Nation Army for when Human Steps on Mars and call it a day.  Everyone’s happy.
    Anyway.  I don’t like this entry so far.  It’s worse than the median entry!  Oh No.  That’ll happen half the time!  I’M Scared.  What to talk about.  Got my guitar on my lap for inspiration.  This will get me going.  Acoustic guitar on me.  Play a little bit here and there Nothing Fancy Nothing Heavy Nothing Complete.  JUST TO GET JUICE FLOWING.  Oh no Mets game is starting.  That will distract me.  That will get the juice constipated!  Terrible!  First game of the season.  If I were a baseball player I’d call seasons Campaigns.  First ironically and then over time with sincerity.  I guess I can do that as any sort of entertainer.  Call TOURS campaigns.  I can call my life a Campaign.  It’s not really a Campaign unless it’s from the campaign region of France.  Yes.  Okay.  Who cares.  METS are already losing 2-0 2 batters into the season!  COOL!  IT’S A SIGN!  A sign to turn the TV off!  Aww I wanted to see Mets Batters.  But there’s more important things at stake!  MY LIFE and MY RESPONSIBLIITIES for instance.  Now I know how readers feel when reading my entries.  HEY MICHAEL IS LOSING 2-0 ALREADY JUST TWO PARAGRAPHS IN.  I SHOULD JUST QUIT READING AND FOCUS ON MY LIFE.  Oh Okay Now I Know How Bo Bichette Feels.
   Anyway.  Bo Bichette.  The Best A Man Can Get.  It’s ad copy you wouldn’t understand.  Okay.  Great.  Don’t wanna alarm anyone but I’ve got high glucose.  Had some bloodwork done earlier this week and my glucose was abnormal!  Sugar is high huh I guess that means I’m a big sweetie pie.  Nothing to be concerned about probably.  No one told me to be concerned!  I’m concerned about other things like Watching Mets Games for the next six months without enjoying them.  I’ll be putting them on but it’ll actually be the wrong move.  I’d get more out of anything else!  I DUNNO.  WE’LL SEE.  The campaign is still early!  Hey the Mets just took a 4-2 lead. That’s exciting.  Very fun.  Good.  I don’t care so much.  You care magnitudes less.  You’re not here for Dated Baseball Updates.  I Hope Not!  OR I HOPE SO.  IF you’re getting your Mets Updates then all of a sudden this entry has PURPOSE. THIS ENTRY WAS A BUNCH OF MISTAKES IN A ROW.  Each topic was wrong.  Everything I said WAS WRONG.  What have we learned.  Have we gotten anything out of our mistakes?  Yes.  Don’t watch baseball while writing entry.  NEVER WATCH BASEBALL while writing.
   Okay ok.  What else is up.  As long as we’re writing a bad entry, might as well write a shitty fifth paragraph!  NO NEED to finish strong!  That’s how I feel about sex in general and that’s how I feel about today’s entry.  What was the movie where it’s like If you give them a good ending then that’s all you need.  Oh.  Adaptation.  But it’s also true When Having Sex I Assume.  It’s funny because I didn’t particularly like the ending to Adaptation most of my life.  Maybe it grew on me at some point.  Sure it’s very DRAMATIC.  But so what.  I just usually don’t get much of anything out of it!  Wonder if I’ll get anything out of the ending of My Life.  I won’t have much time to evaluate really.  Oh well.  Probably will be biased against it because I don’t want my life to end in general.  I’m against any form that my life ending takes no matter what happens exactly to be honest!  Probably.  For at least five years following its release I had trouble thinking Adaptation was actually named Adaption which may or may not be a real word.  Internet says it’s a real word but not really.  That’s What I THOUGHT.  Cool.  That’s IT.  Been getting some spam bot comments lately on the website.  Good sign!  Means the blog is on the map!  We’re taking off!  Anyway.  That’s IT.  See ya later!

-2:13 P.M.

MARCH 26 2026     

    Hi!  Entrytime.  Woke up at an appropriate time TWICE days in a row for doctor’s appointments.  Well, for patient’s appointments.  ME.  ME-CENTRIC LANGUAGE.  I should be the hero of my story.  Either way it’s uncomfortable getting up after a mere nine hours of sleep for about twenty minutes and then it wears off relatively quickly no big deal!  I hope when I get signed to a record label it’s a big deal.  I need to support my future family.  My parents won’t be around to support me and my future family forever!  Hmm.  Better make RECORD LABEL QUALITY music then. Oh okay.  Hipcore is the genre we’re aiming for, I know that much.  Anyway I came up with a music name SO APPROACHING USABLE that part of my brain is passively associating it with my most recent music.  I DID IT.  WHAT HAVE I DONE.  It’s a good name but it also negates any other possible name.  Sure it calls all the great contexts this name creates into question in a good way BUT IT ELIMANATES the infinity of other possible contexts there could be once I settle on this name!  No name music could be about Anything.  One name music is NARROWED DOWN.  WHY DO ARTISTIC PEOPLE NAME THEMSELVES.  Seems unproductive from this angle!   
   Gotta contextualize yourself ultimately at SOME point!  Gotta give people SOMETHIN.  I’m not sure if that’s true.  If I feel uneasy about it, that’s probably just a sign the name I’m thinking of using for a band/one man act extravaganza isn’t The Greatest Name!  Oh okay sounds fair.  IT’S SO CLOSE TO GOOD THOUGH.  That’s how I feel!  Anyway I started rewatching the SAW films.  This time around they really nailed it with the titles.  YES.  I DID SAW THESE FILMS.  I SAW THESE FILMS BEFORE.  NOT LIKE LAST TIME.  Anyway.  For some reason I was really into the one with Chris Rock at the time.  I thought it was gonna catapult him into bigger and better dramatic roles.  I TINK I gave the Saw Franchise too much credit for being a Hollywood fixture.  I hope at some point in my life over the next 40 years we get to a film WAS.  And they play around with time travel in it.  Seems pretty straightforward.  WHY CAN’T Jigsaw travel through time.  SWA… I dunno.  All the anagrams.  I’m good at creativity!  If Jigsaw could go back in time would he SAW Baby Hitler.  Sure he’d SAW ADULT Hitler.  Hmm.  He’d probably ultimately settle on Art Student Hitler.  Seems the most rich experience for some reason.  You can’t really Saw a baby.  They can’t do anything to get out of trap.  And they haven’t done anything to be remorseful of yet.  Hey Baby Remember the time you cried and woke up mother in her sleep.  Now it is you who will face the cries.
    Feels like if Jigsaw was real, Trump would have given him some sort of big authority job, right?  He gets to decide our sentences.  Makes sense.  THAT’S THE WORLD we’re living in.  Jigsaw is real.  There’s ten movies about him.  At some point if there’s enough movies about you it’s more or less real!  Oh okay good.  Anyway I saw Project Hail Mary and I thought it was great!  For the most part.  I really thought it was Very Good to be honest.  I didn’t feel I was watching a Great movie.  I thought I was watching a Very Good movie.  I was distracted because every time I saw the abbreviation PHM (Project Hail Mary) in the film I just kept thinking about Penis Humiliation.  Downgraded a Great movie to a Very Good movie!  Anyway.  Ryan Gosling’s name was almost like Ryan Gosling. Ryland Grace.  That’s his character’s name.  HMM.  I noticed something similar and even moreso with Ella McCay recently.  Emma Mackey.  There are surely more examples of this but you get the idea.  I DUNNO. I DON’T LIKE IT.  Anyway name characters names like Michael Kornblum and apparently I’ll have the inside track!  I’m not an actor. Why would I want the inside track.  HEY A JOB’S A JOB.  It’s a tough economy out there!  Someone’s gotta feed my imaginary future family!  Probably ME for some reason!
    Okay.  I’m all set for the reboot of Arrested Development I guess!  Michael Bluth.  I’m the star somehow!  I figured out how casting works.  You cast the person with the closest name!  This is what they don’t want you to know about Hollywood!  HMM Who will play my halfway antagonistic brother.   WHO CARES A JOB’S A JOB.  Anyway.  I’m not writing the thing.  Just preforming.  Anyway.  Does Jigsaw ever say The Jig… Is Up and then shoot his victim with a gun?  My guess is NO that doesn’t sound like him.  I once called my music project The Uppers.  That lasted for years.  It was good!  It served its purpose!  I liked it!  But I don’t think I’ll be going back to that name!  Wasn’t even perfect at the time.  Was just Pretty Good Alright Sort Of Applicable, I Guess.  It was good because it was kind of bad.  But I got used to it!  Anyway.  I think Michael Bluth’s brother’s name is spelled GOB.  But you get the joke earlier, right?  So no harm done!  Just because you got the joke doesn’t mean there wasn’t any harm done.  Oh.  Okay.  So maybe some harm was done.  Sorry.  I dunno.  Let’s move on anyway!  Huh.  My next School Of Rock show is in 2.5 months.  I guess!  If I learn some of these songs a lot better than I know them right now, it’ll be PRETTY impressive!  Anyway.  Teacher wants me to play real flamboyantly on this Stevie Ray Vaughan song.  Make lots of movements with the guitar and go wild with hands and head.  I’M NO SHOWMANSHIP.  But I guess it’s a good thing to learn.  Didn’t this happen in the movie School Of Rock.  I feel like Zak has the exact line of dialogue I’M NO SHOWMANSHIP.  Hmm.
    Stevie Ray Vaughan died in plane crash.  What is it about rock stars and plane crashes.  Seems kinda suspicious.  Well I guess rock stars are more likely to cause pilot error.  They get the captain all flustered.  THERE’S A MUSICIAN ON BOARD.  Oh.  Their plane almost crashes in Almost Famous.  Well they’re almost famous in almost famous so what that’s how much, “Almost,” counts in Almost Famous.  Touche!  I see Jack Black and Jack White are hosting/musical guesting SNL in 2 weeks.  WOW.  THEY NAILED MY EXACT MUSICAL TASTE FROM SPRING 2003.  That’s pretty much THE ULTIMATE for High School Freshman Michael!  Then again Jack Black won’t be appearing as with Tenacious D.  But the idea is, imagine if he was!  D means DEFENSE in the most literal sense of the band’s name.  Some other things it might mean?  DICK.  DEMOCRAT.  DIMENSION?  I DUNNO DERMOTOLOGY LET’S MOVE ON.  Could just be they love the Note/Chord D.  IN MUSIC.  PITCH.  I DUNNO.  What is Jack Black promoting.  Anaconda coming out on VHS?  Oh The New Super Mario Bros.  I saw a trailer for that.  Seemed kind of UNSETTLING. I forget what happened but I remember feeling Something Feels Wrong.  Some video games are supposed to remain analog.  Not supposed to become big narratives with plots and understandable tangible characters with motives and whatknot.  IT’S WEIRD WHAT THEY DID TO MARIO, I’ll say it!  I guess we gotta see the movie to understand.  Alright.  I’ll see ya later.

-3:28 P.M.   

MARCH 24 2026

    Okay.  Hey!  How’s everyone doing.  I should write an entry for the audience, other people, YOU, this time.  Usually I write for MYSELF.  I think I’ve had enough.  Anyway what kind of ‘Graphs you into.  What kinda paragraphs.  Ya’ll like THIS kind of ‘graphs?  Paragraphs.  Oh No PARA MEANS GHOST.  Scary!  I think I’m ghosting all the people I’ve ever known in my life except my immediate family and a few other exceptions.  Or they’re ghosting me.  Either way We Don’t Keep In Touch!  Anway.  Ghosting doesn’t make sense.  That’s when you ignore someone and go out of your way to avoid them.  I mean YES IDEALLY that’s what a ghost’s relationship is with you.  BUT NOT ALWAYS.  Often ghosts haunt you it’s a real thing and it happens and you don’t want it.  Here’s an example, if you were in the Amityville Horror and someone you knew ghosted you then What Does That Mean.  They’re in touch with you every night essentially!  Anyway.  I dunno.  The Secret Life Of Walter Mitty Horror.  I may not know what to say.  The world is at Horror right now.  Entire globe!  It’s escaped Amityville.  THE WORLD HORROR is where we’re at!  It’s not really supernatural though.  It’s supranatural I guess.  Main cause of horror seems to be concentrated in Donald Trump and his cohorts.  Oh okay good we’re narrowing it down a bit.  That’s productive.
    Whole world is on edge.  By which I mean we’re all listening to the new U2 EP.  His name is THE Edge.  Good.  He was named after the kind of masturbation he likes.  Probably.  When he first came up with it, it was an obscure phrase he thought no one would ever even think to come up with to identify him with!  Decades later though society cracked the code!  Huh.  Huh.  It’s also a chord progression.  WHO IS THAT EDGEE IN THE WINDOW.  What was I talking about.  Oh right World War III.  I’m not scared of World War III because I can’t even Fathom.  I’ll start getting scared of it in *checks watch* a couple of weeks.  My therapist rescheduled an appointment because she’s going on vacation to a country that’s currently not even involved in any violence or anything but she was like well if I cancel it because a complete world war breaks out I’ll let you know so we can go back to the original appointment.  And not in a flippant way.  That’s the reality people are facing ON EARTH today.  Probably the several active astronauts out there are facing pressure as well.  Anyway I saw they’re making a spin-off from Family Guy about Stewie.  I wonder if it will center around French Stewart: the guy from a while ago.  Some actor.  Usually comic I think.  Around the 1990’s or 2000’s usually.  I don’t know why we’re writing/reading this either.  It seems like a terrible waste of our time.
     I may be hitting a wall with this website/post.  MAY be just today.  MAY be website in general.  We’ll see!  What kind of things do you want me to talk about.  What are you interested in!  Michael what do YOU want to talk about.  Oh okay.  College sports can’t we get more transgender involvement in them?  I think we should get more Trans Men involved in the men side of sports.  That way YOU’LL SEE.  See what.  I dunno.  Somethin!  That’ll learn ya!  Anyway.  I almost walked into Woman’s Bathroom a couple of weeks ago at movie theater.  Literally about to cross the threshold doorway before I realized my mistake.  SCARY STUFF.  I don’t know what would have happened!  I think of Sinners about how vampires can’t get into the place.  That’s a best case scenario.  Simply wouldn’t be able to get in.  Worst case scenario is I turn trans.  Second worst case scenario is I make people in the bathroom very uncomfortable and angry at me because I clearly present as A Big Boy.  I dunno.  Anyway.  There’s nothing wrong with being trans.  It just sucks because society mostly treats them like shit.  Other than all the hate and discrimination and even criminalization I’m sure it’s a lovely experience. ALL IN ALL GOOD.  Trans kills two genders with one stone.  YOU’RE KINDA ONE BUT YOU’RE REALLY THE OTHER.  GREAT STUFF.  But Michael they’re not Kinda One They’re Really The Other.  THAT’S WHAT I SAID.  No they’re not Kinda the other one they’re the one that they are.  I THINK WE UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER.     
    Anyway.  I identify as Trans.  TRANSCENDENTAL.  YEAH.  Sure maybe sometimes I kind of feel like a man trapped inside a man’s body.  Wish I had some other man’s body!  It’d be more convenient for reaching things on high shelves!  OH WELL.  I like most things about my body.  I feel at home in my body 80%.  LIGHT BODY DYSMOROPHIA IS ALL IT IS.  Anyway.  When Republicans says Democrats want TRANS FOR EVERYBODY I guess that literally means they want to make all males females and all females males?  FOR WHAT?  WHY.  WHAT POSSIBLE USE WOULD THAT SERVE.  JUST A HUGE MIX-EM-UP?  EVERYONE’S REVERSED ON A CIVILIZATIONAL SCALE?  Why would that… who would that… IN WHAT WORLD…  Anyway.  I want TRAINS FOR EVERYBODY.  I used to like playing with Train Set when I was a kid.  I used to like riding train as a teenager.  I used to like TRAINING DAY as an adult.  I know you’ve heard of T-Pain but have you heard of T-Rain because that’s also a band named Train.  Then there’s T-Rex.  Which is also a band and King Of The Dinosaurs.  King Of The Dinosaurs.  That’s a good band name.  Especially if they made good music.  If they made really good music then it’d be a really good band name.  When asteroid hit all the dinosaurs defiantly were like Die?  No.  Watch how high I Soar.  Then they all died unfortunately.
    Last paragraph.  It’s gonna be 2030 in three and three quarter years.  What should we be doing then.  NOT AT WAR.  BE AT PEACE.  HAVE SOME FUN.  IN THE MIDDLE EAST.  That’s good.  I’m just concerned that for some people Having Fun means BOMBING HOSPITALS.  For me though it’s chillwave.  People at home and abroad listening to chillwave.  Why not.  I dunno.  I saw they’re making a movie with AI Val Kilmer.  Cause regular Val Kilmer is dead.  That sucks!  I don’t wanna see a computer act.  I COULD ACT BETTER THAN THAT.  Why would I watch an inferior product than myself.  I might as well look at myself in a mirror running lines!  I MIGHT AS WELL DO LIENS OFF A MIRROR at this point!  Might as well become a drug addict is what I’m trying to say!  Ride of The Valkilmers.  That a thing?  I dunno!  Val Kilmer was a snooze as Batman in the one movie he was Batman.  Every other actor was dialing it up to eleven and he was just playing it subdued and straight as far as I can remember.  WATCH THE MOVIE.  You’ll see my off the cuff half remembered remark checks out!  YES MICHAEL have you heard of the concept of a straight man.  NO.  NO I HAVEN’T.  Anyway.  He was okay.  But he wasn’t going nuts being Batman.  Well anyway that was an okay Batman movie.  Its one for the kids.  Some Batmen for the adult folks.  This one for the kids!  That’s all.  I’ll see ya later.

-3:22 P.M.

MARCH 19 2026          

    Sure.  Hi!  I finished Schmidt’s Creek and now I started watching PORTLANDIA.  I like it!  I like it a lot!  I wish I lived in The Matrix but The Matrix was like Portlandia.  Wait no maybe I wish I lived in Portlandia but Portlandia was like The Matrix.  I forget.  I watched The Oscars this weekend.  I think they did an okay job.  They awarded people and films.  Everyone sat still for a few hours but sometimes got up and talked when necessary.  The best news of the week though is that one of the songs I’m playing for School Of Rock is supposed to be tuned half a step down but it turns out we’re gonna play it in standard tuning.  So I don’t need to tune my guitar back and forth each time we practice that song.  On the downside, though, now I don’t have an excuse to ever tune my guitar to Half A Step Down Standard Tuning, which is MY FAVORITE.  SO there’s plusses and minuses.  Is there an expression SO There’s Multiplications And Division Sighns because if there is I’ve never heard it!  It presumably applies to some conversations.  I had a good idea for a Math Function that doesn’t yet exist.  You guys know about Exclamation Mark, right?  Like 7!  Means Seven times six times five ETCETERA down to 1.  ANYWAY my new idea is 7? Where it’s the same thing but it’s PLUS instead of MULTIPLICATION.  7? Is 7 PLUS six PLUS five down to one.  Gonna pitch this to shark tank if possible.
   But Michael what possible use does that actually serve in math.  If it ever really came up in The Real World it’d already exist! YEAH PROBABLY. Then again Maybe if the function existed we’d start using it in the real world THEN.  One follows the other!  Shark Tank is called that because someone pitched someone a Shark Tank somewhere at some point and that’s the epitome of The Ultimate Good Pitch.  Hey you guys know sharks, right?  What If We Kept Shark In A Tank?  BRILLIANT THEN WE’D BE SAFE.  Anyway.  How many times per episode does Mark Cuban say Don’t fool around with me Despite what my name might suggest I’m no MARK.  And then does he also ever say Don’t fuck with me Despite what my name might suggest I’m actually not Cuban.  If Cuba Gooding Jr. married Mark Cuban, which, I know, is a long shot… HIS NAME MIGHT GO A LITTLE SOMETHING LIKE THIS… anyway.  Mark JR.  Anyway.  I think it’d be cool to name my kid my name.  Make A JR out of him.  I don’t think Jews do that though.  It’s blasphemous and against Judaism.  Oh well.  My name ALMOST worked out for me.  In some ways I came close to getting a lot out of my name.  I think my kid would have better luck than me.  Just needs that extra bit to get over the top!  Then again if my kid has my name that reflects back on me and my name and suddenly me and my name are back in the spotlight and not necessarily in a good way.   Suddenly I’m Michael Sr!  I don’t like that.  I don’t wanna be a SR.  That sounds awful.
   Oh well.  The seventeenth of the month.  That’s always notable.  Most of the time at least!  Seven Teeth.  How many Teeth is ENOUGH really.  If I lost two teeth I’d be okay.  If I lost three teeth I’d still be okay.  HOW MANY TEETH do I need.  I don’t know.  I remember in Elementary School, third grade or so, we made these little pillowy receptacles to store our baby teeth when we lose them I guess as a prelude for the tooth fairy to give us money or something.  But I don’t get it.  What kind of backwoods occult nonsense is that.  HEY KIDS WE’RE GONNA SAVE OUR BABY TEETH INDEFINITELY.  THIS IS STATE SPOONSERD EDUCATION.  GET TO WORK.  As a kid though it seemed a great class project.  HEY you know what the end product of this is right?  CASH MONEY!  So that’s good.  What’s the point of rewarding kids for losing their teeth.  It’s not like they’re gonna lose their next teeth any faster.  You’re not tangibly encouraging them to do Body Development Any Better monetarily IT WON’T MAKE A DIFFERENCE.  It’s not gonna change anything!  And from another angle, it’s not like they went through anything so traumatic that you need to give them a treat in the form of money.  If anything, losing a tooth is fun.  Spend a week or two tonguing the loose tooth back and forth.  IT’S A TREAT I SAY.
    Cool.  Does anyone know what the tooth fairy is supposed to look like.  I know they cast The Rock as the tooth fairy in a movie but that can’t be canon, right?  Anyway.  Just some random fairy, I guess.  That’s what I’m seeing as I look it up online right now!  Anyway.  What does it mean when you lose teeth in a blog entry.  I dunno.  Also if you die in a blog entry that means you die in real life!  Oh no I’m scared.  The Rock named himself after watching The Sean Connery Movie (1996) and thinking this makes sense to me. Okay.  What else is up.  St. Patrick’s Day!  Be sure to celebrate all the people named Patrick you know and have known in your life!  I assume that’s what we’re supposed to do today.  DON’T MAKE MUCH SENSE but I don’t question The Irish And Their Traditions!  I dormed with a Patrick for a couple of months in 2008.  That’s the only Patrick I can think of.  Didn’t really interact with him much. But hey today is HIS day!  It’s Pat. The SNL sketch/movie that nobody likes.  Is that relevant?  It’s more relevant than ever I feel.  Huh.  The British reboot (concurrentoot?) of SNL is premiering this weekend!  I wanna see what the Hell that is.  I dunno if I’ll be able to see it!  OH WELL.  British people trying to be funny.  Man oh man.  Will they succeed?  It’s possible!  It’s possible they won’t though!  I can’t wait to see if I am able to see!
    Okay.  Lots of sketches about BREXIT I bet.  I don’t know anything about England since 2014.  Anyway.  WOW Brexit was 2020.  Turns out I’m A BIT more up-to-date than I think!  Anyway.  Referendum was in 2016.  IT’S A PROCESS.  They got Tina Feye hosting the first episode.  I assume she’ll say some shit like I CAN SEE IRELAND FROM MY HOUSE and everyone will go crazy.  What does IRE mean.  It means something.  It escapes me at the moment.  Intense anger or rage.  Ireland is THE LAND OF INTENSE ANGER, RAGE, OR WRATH.  I guess that checks out?  IT must!  Otherwise why would they etymology that!  WELL it beats Fireland.  The land that’s constantly on fire.  Wouldn’t wanna live there!  Hmm.  Hey would you like to go to Fire Island?  WHAT?  NO!  THAT SOUNDS DANGEROUS.  It’s a Long Island Island.  I thought Long Island was already Island.  It’s a bonus island!  It’s an extra island to the island! Jeez how many islands does one place need.  PLENTY!  I don’t like it.  What if Ice-T moved to Long Island to settle down.  That would make a lot of people re-think how they think about the world.  IT would make people who previously didn’t think about the world At All START thinking about the world!  Anyway. I guess that’s it.  There’ll be more later the next time I write!  See Ya’s!

-5:06 P.M.

MARCH 17 2026