Hey. I’m glad you’re here! Otherwise I’d just be writing for everyone else. I like everyone else fine I guess. Either way, I dunno, how am I gonna come up with 5 paragraphs! I’ve DONE nothing to write about to inspire five paragraphs. I will be DOING NOTHING to inspire five paragraphs WHILE THEY’RE HAPPENING. I don’t think I’ll do anything IN THE FUTURE to retroactively inspire these paragraphs TIME TRAVEL-WISE. Hmm. I’ve been watching Mad Men. It’s good! Don Draper reminds me of Donald Trump because his name is Don Da’ Raper. They came up with it not me. That other guy in the office reminds me of Dave Foley from Kids In The Hall. Just based on appearance! I THOUGHT IT WAS HIM for an episode or two! Anyway it’s a good show. It encourages me to be less of an asshole like everyone on the show. So Far I’m Still Working On It! Luckily I’m mostly a private asshole! I don’t interact with people too much. Certainly not intimately. Mostly just an asshole in my own mind! Asshole to myself. See how I like it. I DON’T. What’s a good personality though besides being an asshole. Hmm. Who needs a personality. Just BE. Personalities are overrated I think! Take things moment-by-moment! That’ll get you where you’re going!
I’d like some consistency in who I am and what I do and how I behave! That’s what personalities are. Your overall TREND. Oh okay very good. Anyway. Is Private Asshole a character in Catch-22 or something? Feels like I heard that somewhere. I hate all these books or whatever that try to assign meaning to numbers. Let numbers be numbers! That’s what they’re good at! Giving numbers numerology-type meaning is the opposite of what we should be doing! MATH IS ITS OWN THING. IT MEANS NOTHING AND THAT’S WHY IT’S BEAUTIFUL. That’s what makes it cool! You’re RUINING IT. But wouldn’t it be cool if 22 was a particular fun number for some reason. Just MEANT something weird. Wouldn’t that be kinda awesome. STOP IT. YOU’RE PUSHING IT. Anyway. I get it. Started a new book. About Talking Heads. The band! It’s a good book and you know what it’s an okay band. I like that they sound different! Sure all bands sound somewhat different and this band doesn’t sound that much different than any band sounds different from any other band but when I listen to this band’s songs I just think Hey These Songs Sound Different. Even though I’ve only listened to the songs that I Know And Everyone Knows so far. Which really are The Same when it comes down to it. Huh.
Okay. Talking Heads? WHAT ELSE would you expect to be talking? I dunno! Ace Ventura talks with his butt sometimes. Not really. He mimes doing it. I don’t think he actually achieves speech coming from that part of his body. Why do people say you’re talking out your ass like it’s a negative thing. That’d be amazing! The next stage in human evolution! People would be astonished! Anyway. I got a make-up guitar lesson tonight. Awesome! I like that sort of thing. I am strongly considering working on new music tomorrow. If I can dream it, I can do it. And if I can do it, I can do it for a full three or four hours! And if I can do it for a full three or four hours, I WIN. I’ll have accomplished what I set out to do! Things Have Worked Out Exactly The Way I Wanted Them To! What if I did music for 3-4 hours but it was terrible. Good or Not Good Music, There Is Not. JUST IS MUSIC BE. That’d be easy for Yoda to say the only song he knows is the Star Wars Theme. Best song of the 20th century. I like to imagine the characters in Star Wars hear the Star Wars music all the time in the back of their head and can’t exactly explain why. Seems right. Darth Vader himself is consciously thinking the Imperial Death March DUH DUH DUH Duh duh duh DUH DUH DUH whenever he walks around.
Alright. Star Wars was the first song I learned. On Piano. I just played the main riff. YES. That’s all I could play the first 13 years of my life! MUSICWISE. Anyway. What else is up. I don’t mean to brag but we own a piano. There’s a whole ass piano in our house. I don’t know how we got it in there but it’s here! Hmm. WHAT’S THE DEAL with guitar pedals these days. They cost three times as much as they did when I was a kid! Exact same pedal that was $40 when I was a teenager is now $120! Let’s get some Talking Heads complaining about that one. It’s what people are concerned about! Meet people where they are! Makes me wanna not buy a guitar pedal at all. I already don’t wanna because I gotta do manual work! Gotta STEP ON IT. What I gotta do exercises while I’m playing my song? Don’t I have enough going on? I DON’T LIKE IT. Anyway. All these Talking Heads people went to Art School. I’ve never been good at visual arts! Drawing or painting or anything. Solidly in the bottom 10% at all that stuff! NOTABLY poor. I dunno if it’s hand-eye coordination or just hands or just eyes or what! BRAIN maybe! Maybe if I was inspired I could draw something interesting but for the most part I suck. I just look at the world and think HOW CAN I POSSIBLY REPRODUCE THIS. It’s impossible! Can’t be done! I wouldn’t know where to begin!
Huh. Let’s see. “Traditional Art,” starts off as a palindrome but then goes nowhere! Fun. Almost! If you were talking about David Byrne’s of Talking Heads possessions you would say Mr. Burns something or something. That guy from that Television Thing. Anyway. Trying to remember things I’ve drawn. I think in sixth grade art I once had to draw my kitchen. And I drew my microwave and window and other stuff way out of proportion. And everything just looked terrible. Like a six year old drew it. Can’t remember if it was drawn from memory or if I even had the benefit of Observation. Hmm. Maybe the microwave was bigger because it looms large in my heart. THAT WASN’T THE ASSIGNMENT. Anyway. I understand the assignment! Draw your kitchen in proportion. Okay Very Good. Not a panoramic view. Not each and every side of your kitchen! Pick one place to look at! There are 31 kids in this class teacher can’t go through 124 drawings! I think my kitchen has more than four walls. Maybe six. It is a Corner Kitchen. It wraps around a corner. I can’t do the math in my head right now but it’s complicated! WOW. Okay. I just doxed my kitchen. Next thing you know my kitchen is getting bomb threats. Is the phrase, “Kitch,” from, “Kitchen?” OR VICE VERSA? Either way who cares I’m done with the entry! See ya later!
-4:55 P.M.
JAN 20 2026
Leave a Reply